HOLY SHIT! THE FIRST FEMALE TEAM HAS WON THE AMAZING RACE! WHY ARE MORE PRESSES NOT BEING STOPPED? This is a landmark win rivaled only by the first left-handed person to ever win at ping pong and the first man with a lisp to ever win a debate. By which I mean, was this remotely worth all of the time on the show spent building up this possibility? Yes, it hadn't happened until tonight, but is this one giant step for womankind? Move over suffragettes, someone has finally stepped up to take your place as role models!

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I wasn't going to be able to write much tonight, as we had some family over and I'm exhausted. (I know: broken record.) But the show made it easy for me to say very little. Hard to pump up much "who will make the final three?" drama when the fourth team is nine hours behind.

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Just a few thoughts tonight, one of which is probably everybody’s takeaway: racing with Nick is like racing with a 14-year-old boy who just listened to the audiobook of Jack Kerouac’s On the Road and thinks that his parents just don’t get it, man. What a petulant pain in the ass. And there’s something about the bandana hooding his eyes that only makes him seem like more of a clown; the giant bandana actually makes it look like he’s not old enough to fit into it, so he comes off as even more of a manchild. Someday you’ll grow into that bandana, little friend, and then you will be a true punk!

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